So say the people.  We were making pumpkin chocolate chip cookies tonight, and when it came time to blend, both Sugar and Engineer suggested getting a stool so they could watch and also laugh.  And sure enough as soon as I started the mixer, they both spontaneously erupted with canned laughter. 

I never realized that making cookies was so funny.

I guess it’s been a long time since I was 5. 

I just have to post some of the wit of Engineer:

He had his first music class on Tuesday and the teacher told me he has a beautiful voice (beam).  As we were getting in the car I told him that I heard he did some wonderful singing.

E: I did NOT sing
Me: Well Miss Singy said you did.
E: (matter of fact) Well, maybe she’s lying. 

              —————–
 

At kindergarten when they don’t finish their snack, the rest of it gets put in their backpack.  Engineer keeps coming home with pretzels in his baggies.  (Yesterday it was even pretzel goldfish.)   

Me: Do you not like pretzels or something?
E: I like pretzels.
Me: Then how come pretzels keep coming home with you in your bag?
E: Because I forgot to throw them away. 

If your four year old requests chewing gum and you know she had some yesterday, I now recommend just giving her a piece no matter how early in the morning it is.  If you don’t, she just might get yesterday’s piece out of the trash and not only re-chew it, she will generously share with her baby sister.

It’s Engineer’s fourth day of kindergarten, his second day of riding the bus and the novelty has officially worn off. 

He told me today that he didn’t want to go back.

My momma-loves-her-little-boy for ten seconds contemplated homeschool and then the real me told him to suck it up.  Okay, well, I didn’t say it like that.

Turns out part of the reason he is so done is that he got in trouble today.  In Engineer’s class you see, when they don’t "make their day" by following the rules they get their frog taken down.  And here the lad is chatting with me about how he took his own frog down because he didn’t want it up there anymore because he doesn’t want to go to school.

So like any suspicious parent, I checked his bag and found the teacher note saying he didn’t make his day.  Why?  What was the issue?  After several requests from the teacher to get him to complete his work he responded by yelling and crying and thus disrupted the students.  This is of course, typical behavior for the boy with large emotions.  The boy with no in between level.

 I sure hope she can do a better job of gettting him to simmer down, because I’ve sure had a heck of a time with it.

So while on our Pennsylvania vacation we were lucky enough to get funned out at a couple of theme parks– Dutch Wonderland and Hershey Park.  (This post is full of pictures, by the way).  Both have waterpark features.  While at Hershey Park the boy (Engineer) lost his underwear in between changing from his regular clothes to his swimsuit, etc…  So for the latter half of the day he freestyled it.  He did pretty well– not much complaining or anything– and I was impressed.  At 11 pm as we are leaving the park, he casually says, "I sure do miss my underwear."

And we are now all laughing.

And now, the photo journal of Dutch Wonderland and Hershey Park!

Spider loves the carousel with an excessive passion.  Everytime she would see one, it was "Ah! Ponies!  Ah! Ah! Ah!"  It was her birthday the day we went to Dutch Wonderland, and we indulged the little princess I don’t know how many times.

I just love this picture of Sugar:

And then there’s the Boy, the endless bench rider.  He is like an extreme mini me when it comes to his ride "chicken-ness."  It’s just a little ol’ carousel!

Oh the Dutchness:

At least someone is smiling at the camera:

This ride (Hershey Park) ticked me off.  It has these tiny ponies on it, but they won’t let toddlers ride (they could fall off because mom and dad can’t ride either.)  Spider had a total meltdown when the ride guy said she was too short.  Soooo many kids walked away from this ride crying for the same reason.  But lucky for us, before the ride started an old man took over and he said she could ride as long as I was sure she wouldn’t fall off.  I was ever so grateful that the sadness was over.

This ride was cute: 

And also lame as shown by this girl I don’t know.  She did this the whole ride and I thought it was funny.Clearly she was trying to tell her parents her disapproval of this dopey ride.

We ate lemons!  And rode a little train! 

And yet again… (Good thing I look so good after a day at the waterpark.  Eew.)

And the day is done.  Spider with Daddy’s new t-shirt.

Or at least that’s how she percieves it.  Always on the go– with lots of carseats and small kids.  I can relate.

 P.S.  There is but one carseat.  All the rest of the "babies" are secured with the orange "string."  That is how they are kept safe.

"Mom, how do animals kiss?"

I was stunned.  My little baby boy already thinking about kissing.  What kind of a world are we living in? As I tried to prod him for more information as to why he needed to know with no luck, I finally gave up and said, "they rub noses, I guess."

"Nope!  They lick!" he replied.

"Lick what?" I asked back appalled at the possibilities.

"Faces, silly."  

Oh.  Like puppy kisses.  Completely innocent.  Better get my mind out of the gutter. 

My freshman roommates in played their music loud and late because they didn’t have any classes at 8:00 am.  I neither shared their taste in "music" nor their non-morning class schedule so many a night I would stumble into the kitchen squinty eyed and sour faced and request a volume adjustment.  I met with much resistance and it was later brought to my attention that if I just asked nicer, than they would be more accomadating. 

So the next time it happened, I fluffed my hair, opened my eyes and with a smile on my face said to them, "dear roommates, as much as I enjoy the sounds coming from the kitchen at this late hour, and as much as I desire for you to have as enjoyable a study session as possible, the volume is a bit much for my tender ears.  Do you think it would be possible, do you think you could maybe please turn down the sound so that I may be rested for my early classes tomorrow?  Oh please oh please, it would mean so much to me."

Fine.  Not that exactly, but I did say please.  And I did try to smile. 

And despite my best efforts I was told that I was still not very nice about that way I asked for them to turn their music down.  (I have since concluded that most people just don’t like being told what to do no matter how pleasant you are about it, but that is a topic for another time.)  So I continued to try to improve, and they continued to shut me down.  And I continue to experience this kind of thing in my life, because I am unfortunately cursed with the I-will-offend-you-no-matter-how-hard-I-try-to-say-it-nicer-if-there-is-even-a-remote-chance-that-you-could -be-offended-by-the-content-of-my-comment disease.  Sad but true.

And it is apparently genetic. 

The other day I asked Engineer ever so nicely to please clean up his toys (okay, I TOLD him to with a snotty tone) and he in return told me to ‘GO AWAY’.  I reminded him that he should not speak to me that way and that it made me sad when he talked to me like that.  He paused, put a sweet, if not slightly whiny, tone in his voice and said, "Mommy, will you please leave because we are just so sick of you." 

I laughed.  And then I grounded him for life. 

And then I wished I had not passed him this particular legacy. 

Have you ever played Lego Star Wars?  The video game?  We love it so much at our house that sometimes the children act it out during their times of imaginative play.  Of course, they act out many video games– Super Smash Brothers, Cloning Clyde, Caster.  Sugar is always the princess character, Engineer the hero, and Spider is some lame-ish sidekick, like R2-D2. And somedays like yesterday, they pretend that they are in a video game and the main characters are themselves.

Now before I go on (I promise I am headed somewhere here) it needs to be noted that Lego Star Wars the video game has all kind of characters you can choose to play.  The main characters, of course are those you need to complete the game’s requirements, but if you have a lot of gold, you can buy characters.  Fun but useless characters like jawas or cantina performers.  Yesterday while the children were acting out their own game, the following conversation ensued:

Eng: Okay, we’ve got Sugar character, Engineer character and Spider character.
Sug: What about Mommy?
Eng: No, you have to buy her.
Me: (understanding what this implies) You have to buy me?
Eng: Yes.
Sug: Okay, let’s buy her.
Eng: No, I only want players that are going to WIN.

Do you know what this means?  He thinks his mama’s a loser.  Or maybe he just thinks I can’t win, like I don’t finish what I start.  Like I stink at cleaning the house.  Like I am bad a video games?  Like I am lame in so many countless throw-another-jawa-on-the-fire ways.  (Maybe I am reading too much into this?)  I am so not having any of that.

Oh, it’s on Little Man.  Bring it.  Bring it on. You are about to see just what this Mama can do.

Every morning that Charming leaves before the children wake up, he comes into our room, says goodbye and requests that I not forget to say morning prayers with the children.  It always makes me think Qui-Gon Jin’s last request in Star Wars Episode 1– "promise me you’ll train the boy…"  Something to smile about I guess.

So this morning, after a nightmare filled sleep (I think I am watching this show a little too much) I get this request and then 30 minutes later the girls are in my room requesting, not prayers, but breakfast.  We are working hard on getting the people to ask before they get food, but they seem to never ask when I am able to do it, and always ask while I am asleep.  Anyway.  For about 20 minutes they snuggled in my bed, kicked each other and drew pictures on my back.  When I was finally not a zombie Sugar asked a funny question.

"Why do you have squishy dots on your back?"

I have moles.  Who doesn’t?  But why would she call them moles when squishy dots is a much better descriptor.  Is there a suggestion box for that somewhere?  New, better, medical terms suggestions?

 Anyway.

So then we made muffins for breakfast.  Spider immediately wanted butter on hers.  She then proceeded to eat a piece, request more butter, eat a piece, and request more butter until her muffin was gone.  And when it was gone, I went in to clean the kitchen.

And when I cam back, she had found something else to eat:

Yes, that is butter in her squishy little hand.  And yes that is a butter knife in her mouth.  I’m a terriblt mother, I know.  How was your Monday morning?